The excitment. The anticipation. The thrill of knowing that something is…..

COMING

UP

NEXT!

My personal fav from 1983:

Here they are all together:

The future of online ordering.

The future of mobile communication.

The future of fashion!

The first stab at Skype:

The future of being lazy, in bed, and reading your iPad:

Hi, everybody.  First time blogger, long time customer.  Be gentle with me.
So last night, my kids and I had Dance Party.  Dance Party is another one of these parent things that must always be capitalized to lend it a certain gravitas.  Like “I have to drive for Swim.”  And “I have to make Snack for the whole kindergarten.”  It makes you feel like you’re putting your MBA to good use.  “I have to change Diaper.”  “I have to play Dress-Up.”  “I have to drink Martini.”
But Dance Party is actually one of the high points of my week.  If you’re not dancing like a maniac around your kitchen with a sweaty pink little 7-year-old boy, you’re really missing out.  
We favor the classics.  “I’m a Gummy Bear” always makes our playlist.

Gummy Bear Song

“Ça plane pour moi” is also big.  Do you remember this song?  It’s basically all one note.  He even dances like a 7-year-old.

Plastic Bertrand

But it’s not all strange Eurotrash with us.  Far from it!  I’ve found that with the under-10 set, your best bet is something that was scandalous when it came out, but is now just kind of quaint.  “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.”  Big. “Material Girl.”  Huge.  “Carmina Burana.”  Enormous.
(I stand corrected.  I guess it is all Eurotrash with us.)
But anyway, that’s why I’m walking with a limp today, thanks for asking.  Now, about Martini…

Hey, do you have any toothpicks?  No, they are not for my teeth.    Come on now,   I don’t get a chance to even eat half the time.   They are to keep my eyes open.

I am back.

 Where did I go, you ask?

 Maternity leave.                

 Sigh.  And it has come to an end.   

 And to be honest, I am tired.  3:30 a.m. is entirely too early to start any day never mind a work day, but that was my reality this morning.   It helps to think of all the working moms around the world who are wearily kissing their babies goodbye and heading off to work, because it reminds me that I am not the only one in this situation and we all rally through the day and get up and do it again tomorrow.    I don’t know where the strength comes from to be a mom.   It often boggles my mind to think of the zillions of selfless things that a mom has to do on a daily basis.   It’s a strength you give birth to when you give birth…….a superhuman strength indeed.

I work because diapers and food among other important things that are vital to life are not free.  That and the fact that I didn’t marry Bill Gates.  And the reason for this blog today (Yes, there is a reason..….hold on.  I am getting there) is to acknowledge that I have got the love.

 The love for my new beautiful baby girl, the love of my now family of four, the love of my co-workers who make even the most sleep deprived days a joy and who are there to hold me up when I need it.    I swear if I worked anywhere else this transition of coming back to the workplace would be…… well, just dreadful.  Everyone here is wonderful.   I know I have bragged about them on other posts, but it is so the truth! 

So it’s good to be back.  I have a new baby and a new perspective on the world and even though I may be tired (really tired today) I wouldn’t change a thing.  So this is just a quick shout out to my co-workers and to all our friendly customers who call in everyday and our sales reps that I gossip with and share stories with.   Thanks for making it a little easier to come back into the working world.  

Call me and we can catch up.  And also, if I happened to be nodding off, it will wake me back up; because let’s face it even though Blue Q is really cool to work for I am pretty sure sleeping at work is frowned upon.

This post can only touch, with the teeny tiny tip of a Q-tip, an itty bitty little bunch of Opening Credit sequences which either totally ROCK!!!! or totally…..suck…..But you must admit, they bring you back.  For example, Small Wonder (yep, remember THAT gem?)…..makes me wanna race to the john, lift up the lid there and make loud gagging sounds.

Not that I had a bad childhood.

But a robot?  Named Vicky?  From Delaware?  Who the hell greenlighted that gem?  But I digress.  OPENING CREDITS…sequences….they get you going from the start.  You hear the beginning of your favorite Thursday night show (when they did that kinda thing) and you get the couch ready for an hour (or half an hour) of “me time”.  Or “procrastination” time. 

And they certainly have changed over the years.

(man, look at that outfit they had that Vicky actress wear.  Oy.)

Anyway, enjoy.

It’s been a long time coming, that’s for certain.  And it was a big adventure – just ask Seth – and no, this doesn’t have anything to do with the Brita Filter Phone that Sergio created from scratch.

This is new phone time. For everyone!!!!!

New rings!!

New Colors!!

First, let us mourn the loss of my favorite, my dear friend, my ex-steady – “old teley”:

Look at that pathetic little number.  So broken.  So hardworking.

Firstly, it’s missing it’s windshield….

and it’s got a bum leg – cut off right at the knee there….

…and you can see here where Seth tried to velcro the thing to my desk so that I wouldn’t drop it….again….But then I guess once I dropped it too hard?….the velcro is just symbol of trying to do what’s right. 

Sorry Seth.

And I’m not sure what’s missing here on the receiver here, but kinda looks like SOMETHING, right?

So, after some training….

And even MORE intense training (oh pah-leeeze, really, guys?  How many dorks does it take to screw in a new phone system?)…..

We have all finally received these little puppies:

ooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhh….

aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh…….

It’s screen lights up!!!  The numbers too!!!!  Look at it all go blinkety blink!

AND!!!  AND AND AND you can color code your calls and this is really Purple, but Jess insists it’s hot pink!!!

OK!  What the hell!!!  Hot Pink it is!!!!

It’s a brave new world.

Thank You Valley Communications Systems Inc.,  from Chicopee, Massachusetts!!!

I promise not to drop this one.

At least….I promise to try.

Had to share (click to enlarge):

I was in a furniture store this weekend that had pushed the “artificial realism” element of furniture sales to a new level.

In order to make the suggested rooms feel more like home, they sprinkled the place with a litter’s-worth of fake, stuffed cats. Sporting disturbingly realistic fur and faces that appeared more pug than feline, the cats were curled up on couches, chairs, beds, under tables, etc.

I know it was supposed to project a “make your home more homey with this furniture” message but frankly what I got was “this furniture will turn you into a crazy cat lady.” And not like a regulation crazy cat lady but one who stuffs and mounts her beloved Mr. Jangles, Poopsies, and Noodle after they’ve entered their 10th life.     
Needless to say I didn’t buy anything.

I was, however, inspired to learn more about where one buys fake cats (it’s never too early to start thinking about Christmas).
What I found was better than even I could have imagined: FurReal Breathing Cats.
 

The website describes them this way:
“FurReal Breathing Pet Cats have a realistic breathing action lasting several weeks from 2 x AA alkaline batteries (not included). Each FurReal Pet Cat comes complete with a fleece bed, fold-up carry along packaging, on/off switch…Whether they’re napping at your feet while you watch tele, or snoozing at the foot of the bed…with a FurReal Pet Cat you’ll never be alone again!”
Not a cat lover? Or hoping for a bigger fake breathing creature for your homey space? Don’t worry, there’s an Asian manufacturer busy using the fur of real creatures to create fake creatures up to 5-feet in length. Really:
“The main material in making furry animals is the fur from rabbits, goats, sheep and lambs. Through tanning and sterilization, it won’t do any harm to the health of human body. Almost all can be done by artificial fur if your country does not allow real animal fur.

We produce and export furry animals of three main sizes ranging from 5 feet to 2-3 inches with more than 1000 designs of cats, dogs, horses, tigers, deer and other animals. You will enjoy the lovely furry animals!”
(http://cnhftoy.itm.com.cn/688082/snoring-cats-and-dogs-breathing-cats-and-dogs.htm)
Hmmm, I wonder how much Christmas wrap a fake breathing horse will take?

I don’t like disagreements between co-workers.  It makes for uncomfortable coffee times alone in the kitchen when you silently ignore the other person pretending that you’re thinking….really hard….about making……..coffee.  No time to talk to you, co-worker who I KNOW stole my copy of Bust Magazine out of the bathroom** because I saw it in your pocketbook.  I’m busy.  Must leave now.  And then you walk, very quickly and with strong footing out of the kitchen over to your desk.

But.

I’m going to have an open argument here.

Seth, my boss, says that this toaster – this toaster that I said, “Hey!  We should get this for the kitchen!  It’s so cool.” – he says this toaster looks like a car battery (ok, that’s not what he said, but I can’t remember now, and it kind of DOES look like a car battery).

Then he tries to sell me on his idea of HIS perfect toaster.  He’s all like, “I like THIS toaster, at least you can figure out where to put your toast, unlike that thing you like, I mean what is it, a toaster or a deep fryer?”

Oh.  That’s right.  He called my toaster a deep fryer.

Well, I think HIS toaster looks like a barn heater.

So there.

Either way, Seth, can you get us a friggin’ toaster that doesn’t take 43 minutes for a piece of bread to turn brown and crunchy?  It’s like waiting for a Spirit Airlines plane to lift off.  Every morning.

Thanks.

In advance!

**p.s. Is it totally gross to take reading material out of the john at work to show someone an article?  I routinely do it and I should probably stop, but you HAVE to read this in the Onion.  Couldn’t stop laughing.

So I was looking the x-tremegeek.com catalog today and came across a ballpoint pen encased in a wooden sheath so that it looks like a pencil.
 
Really?

This is a good idea?

Under what circumstances is it necessary or desirable to make it look like you’re using a pencil when you’re actually using a pen?

“Honey, I know our reconciliation is going so well but just for fun, I’m going to pretend to sign these divorce papers in pencil…HA! Gotcha! It’s not really a pencil, it’s a pen! I am so outta’ here.”

Hmmm, maybe they make little golf-sized ones. Tiger might find them useful.