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I was in a furniture store this weekend that had pushed the “artificial realism” element of furniture sales to a new level.

In order to make the suggested rooms feel more like home, they sprinkled the place with a litter’s-worth of fake, stuffed cats. Sporting disturbingly realistic fur and faces that appeared more pug than feline, the cats were curled up on couches, chairs, beds, under tables, etc.

I know it was supposed to project a “make your home more homey with this furniture” message but frankly what I got was “this furniture will turn you into a crazy cat lady.” And not like a regulation crazy cat lady but one who stuffs and mounts her beloved Mr. Jangles, Poopsies, and Noodle after they’ve entered their 10th life.     
Needless to say I didn’t buy anything.

I was, however, inspired to learn more about where one buys fake cats (it’s never too early to start thinking about Christmas).
What I found was better than even I could have imagined: FurReal Breathing Cats.
 

The website describes them this way:
“FurReal Breathing Pet Cats have a realistic breathing action lasting several weeks from 2 x AA alkaline batteries (not included). Each FurReal Pet Cat comes complete with a fleece bed, fold-up carry along packaging, on/off switch…Whether they’re napping at your feet while you watch tele, or snoozing at the foot of the bed…with a FurReal Pet Cat you’ll never be alone again!”
Not a cat lover? Or hoping for a bigger fake breathing creature for your homey space? Don’t worry, there’s an Asian manufacturer busy using the fur of real creatures to create fake creatures up to 5-feet in length. Really:
“The main material in making furry animals is the fur from rabbits, goats, sheep and lambs. Through tanning and sterilization, it won’t do any harm to the health of human body. Almost all can be done by artificial fur if your country does not allow real animal fur.

We produce and export furry animals of three main sizes ranging from 5 feet to 2-3 inches with more than 1000 designs of cats, dogs, horses, tigers, deer and other animals. You will enjoy the lovely furry animals!”
(http://cnhftoy.itm.com.cn/688082/snoring-cats-and-dogs-breathing-cats-and-dogs.htm)
Hmmm, I wonder how much Christmas wrap a fake breathing horse will take?

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